All about me!

Is it weird to post 2 posts in one day? How about one hour?? WELL....I wanted to take this time to let you guys know a little more about me!

My name is Laura, and I live in western NY. I graduated college when I was 19, and started my first job as a Physical Therapist Assistant (PTA) shortly after my 20th birthday! Sometimes I miss the college life, but I also am glad to be out of the drama that school entails. I left New York to go to college in Pennsylvania, and while I LOVED and MISS PA, I came back to NY after I graduated 3 years ago. I'm not sure how long I'll be here, but for now, it is where God wants me to do.

When I'm not at work, I LOVE to take pictures!!


Winter


Spring


Summer


Fall


Those are just a few of pictures I've captured throughout the years...have no fear--there will be PLENTY more to come!

Other things I enjoy doing in my free time: Kick-boxing, working out, reading books, and spending time with my family and my 5 best friends!

Well...there's a sneak-peak at me! Til next time...

CRAZY times....

Holy cow...1 week without a post, and I feel like it has been 1 year+ since I've written anything. (A strange feeling, since I JUST decided to be more consistent with my blogging, oh maybe 3 weeks ago, lol!) I feel like someone hit the fast-forward button this week and there has been no slowing down!

Work this week, was well....work. There were many times, I felt that I was on the verge of losing it....thankfully 30 second prayers with God kept me focused for that moment and able to accomplish the tasks at hand.

I've also started to notice a "trend" in how my days go, depending on if I've given the WHOLE day over to God first thing in the morning, or if it takes me a while to give it to him. Here's where I struggle: I'm not a morning person. I need a semi-large cup of coffee to really get me going and to make me, well...me!



So...what I have always done in the past, is study my Bible/do my devotions in the evenings. Works great, still get the studying aspects done then...but I'm finding, if I don't give the day over pretty much from the get-go, it's going to be a tough day.

I heard one of my favorite songs on the radio as I was driving to work this week. Britt Nicole sings the song "Set the World on Fire" and it really hit home (again) this week.

[Verse 1]
"I wanna set the world on fire
Until it's burning bright for You
It's everything that I desire
Can I be the one You use?

[CHORUS]
I, I am small but
You, You are big enough
I, I am weak but
You, You are strong enough to

Take my dreams
Come and give them wings
Lord with You
Nothing I can not do
Nothing I cannot do..."

Here's my question for you, and for me. In the middle of the chaos and confusion I face each and every day...am I allowing God to use me the way I should be used? Or am I SOO busy fighting tooth-and-nail to have it my way. Days seem so much more 'smoother' when I give God the control from First thing in the morning, til I close my eyes at night. Guess I know an area in my life that needs improving...

"Dear Lord, I come to you with a problem in my life. I pray right now, that you may be the first thing on my mind, that I will be quick to give you control of my days, and that I will trust you to guide my actions, words, and interactions throughout my day. I know this won't be easy, Lord, but I know it will benefit me in the end. Thank you for being my savior, best friend, and redeemer. I LOVE YOU!"

Blessings in Disguise

I write this today feeling like God has given me a breath of fresh air. I was encouraged by two of my besties (M & B) to consider taking a half-day off of work Friday afternoon and spend it with the two of them. See, M is prego with her first, biological baby (YAY!) and due in the next few short days :) (I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET HIM...but you can't tell I'm excited, can you??) SOOO...I went to work on Thursday, and put in a last-minute request with my boss about getting Friday afternoon off....sure enough, it got approved!!!

Then....Thursday evening came around and M called me to tell me her 6yr old had come home from school again with another fever and that she was taking him to the doctor on Friday to have him tested for strep. Sure enough, the poor little one had it and we decided to cancel with her, so the rest of us wouldn't get it :(

B & I decided we were still going to get together, and what a wonderful time we had! While her little one E was taking a nap, we did what girls do best...GIRL TALK!!! As the hours went by, God kept blessing us with great conversation topics that helped encourage us both.

We both decided that PD Cook's recent sermon topics have been hand selected by God to minister to us two directly. There are times in my life where church has seemed like a "boring" thing to partake in, but right now, I feel as though I'm on the cusp of something great and wonderful!!!

So ya, I finally took my first (half) day off of work for the year....yes I am blessed to say it has taken me until March to use a vacation/sick day. God gave me a much needed rest break from the crazy-busy schedule I've been taking lately...and blessed me in return with the first sense of being refreshed in a long time!!!

Perseverance

So my Pastors message yesterday really REALLY hit home with me....do I persevere or do I cave under pressure/hard times?

PERSEVERANCE: (1) to walk under the load; (2) ability to endure when circumstances are tough

Lately, I have been ready to CRUMBLE into broken pieces, unwilling to be put back together. The stress factor(s) in my life lately has been HUGE and unrelenting...and I have been ready to quit, several times in fact. It seems like there is just too much on my plate. No other way to put it.

So here's what got me thinking: "Perseverance is the pathway to maturity..." (PD Cook) I know darn well, there are two possible ways for me to react to EVERY situation: my way or God's way. I've been feeling lately like I've given God control over MOST situations...yet I'm still doing my best to hold onto some myself. Why when the tough gets going, do I not hand the control over to Him and just follow his lead??

This is where perseverance comes into play. When I'm fighting him tooth and nail, is that making me more mature and Christlike?? I think a big NO WAY! God wants to make me more like him, and isn't he trying to do that right now...by showing me that the ONLY way to survive the day is to let Him have control over my every move??

Here are some other quotes that got me thinking:

"Sometimes God calms the storms, and othertime he calms his child."

"When you want to pull your hair out--dig your roots into Gods faithfulness."

"If you're thinking about quitting, it's too soon."

"If you want to quit something--quit trusting yourself."

I can't say that this will be a smooth-sailing adventure for me as I enter each new day. But somehow I feel this message was just the beginning of something BIG! I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous, apprehensive, or anxious about what God has in-store for my life...but hey who isn't?


I'll close with this thought/verse
Jeremiah 29:11-- "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"

Trusting God

It has been a while since I've been on here, sorry friends. Life has been full of ups and downs, but through it all, God has been showing me more and more how when I trust HIM with my life, things go that much smoother. Easier said then done most times though...

Things at work lately have been crazy, with me ultimately having more on my plate. As selfish as this might sound, I can tell God has been more in control simply because I don't feel as stressed or frustrated with the situations at hand. My dad always says "We are either: headed into a trial, coming out of one, or in the middle of it right now." And I've gotta say, I feel like right now I'm smack-dab into the middle of the tough time. Some days, I'm beyond ready to pull my hair out...other moments are smooth sailing. The ups and downs have been like a pendulum swinging back and forth, back and forth.

This is where God's faithfulness has been proving itself to me over and over again. It seems like just at the "worst possible moment", someone or something reminds me that I'm probably trying to go about this "situation" on my own strength, and not God's strength. My favorite verse just keeps popping into my head: Philippians 4:13-- "I can do everything through him who who gives me strength."

And while I know God is faithful and give me strength, why, must I continually doubt my Savior...the one who so willingly went to the cross and died for me? I know it is my human nature, but He sacrificed EVERYTHING for me...what is holding me back and causing me to doubt his love and faithfulness?? I think I can answer this question...I'm scared of what God might ask me to do. I know He can ask me to continue with where He currently has me, or he might have some big drastic plan for me...and the "unknown factor" scares me. It's not like He has let me down, just when I begin to think He isn't going to come through, BOOM! There is my answer (and let me be honest...it's usually a pretty decent answer)!

As I close this, I'm reminded of another favorite verse from Proverbs. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."

Stealing Blog Idea!

Well, I was reading a friends' friends blog tonight and I really liked the following posting that she did. Pretty much a Q & A but works for any day when a "blog" topic isn't coming so easily. Enjoy!

FOR TODAY..

Outside my window...partly cloudy sky showing a beautiful sunset!

I am thinking...how exausted I am, and ready for a break.

I am thankful for...an amazingly supportive family.

From the kitchen...Ate out tonight, so the dishes were super easy!

I am wearing...Comfy clothes, AKA pajamas :)

I am creating...a blog

I am going...to put a movie in and relax my night away!

I am reading...The Help by Kathryn Stockett

I am hoping... that God knows what is best for my life right now, and that through trusting Him, He will work out everything according to HIS plan.

I am hearing...the song playing over and over in my head. (Forever Love, by Francesca Battistelli)

Around the house...Dishes are done. Sheets are clean.

One of my favorite things...kickboxing!

A few plans for the rest of the week: Work tomorrow, but local festival Friday night. Bowling Saturday for the church fundraiser on Saturday. Church and family time on Sunday.

Learning to trust God

Right now, I can tell that the Lord is trying to teach me how to go about my life by being fully dependent and trusting in His plan.

Jeremiah 29:11 ""For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'"

This is one HUGE area in my life that I completely struggle with. I am a planner. Deep down inside me, down to my very core, I PLAN! I plan my days, weekends, chores, shopping list, etc. You get the point.

So what is it like for me to have to completely trust that things in my life are not under my control, but God's control? It's like a form of Chinese-torture for me.

Right now, I am facing a semi-small issue at work, that feels ginormous. I'm sure 6 mo, a year from now, I will look back at this blog and wonder why I let myself get so worked up over this issue...cuz no matter what, God's will is going to take place. It is more a matter of getting my attitude in check and being prepared for what the Lord has for me in this area of my life.

I have put on a front about work for a while now. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my job. However there are certain aspects of it that irritate me, and have progressively been getting worse. Now most of you would say "Go talk to your boss about it." Well...if only it was that easy. My boss isn't necessarily the most confidential of people. Lets just say, everyone would know my concerns/issues by the end of the day.

So what do I do?? Well, first of all, I pray a LOT. Next, I kick-box, lol. It's amazing what a great exercise you are getting while you beat up on a punching bag and relieve TONS of stress. But bottom line, I am handing this situation back over to the Lord. He knows what my short-term and long-term future holds. He will guide my steps tomorrow and the next day and the next day. He will "never leave me nor forsake me" (Hebrews 13:5b).

"Thank you Lord, for being with me always. I am not the easiest person to deal with, and I must fail many times before I succeed for You, but Your never-ending grace and mercy that is poured out on me, give me the strength needed to carry on in life. I trust in you Lord. No matter where life may lead me, I know You will be guiding my footsteps and keeping me from harms ways. I will go through tough times, but You will carry me. Thank you for dying on my cross, and for being the bridge that closes the gap between me and Heaven. I love You, and trust You."

Introductions...

Hello all...It just dawned on me that while I have posted a few random posts over the past few years, if this is something I would like to get into doing more often, I should probably introduce myself!

My name is Laura, and I come from a small town in Western New York. I am a licensed Physical Therapist Assistant and absolutely love my job. I work in an outpatient facility so I get to treat patients with a smorgasbord of injuries/illnesses/issues. This leads to a wide variety of people I get to interact with each and every day!!

I absolutely love to work out, and kickboxing and pilates are my top 2 favorites. I don't mind going on a run, but I have to be in the "mood" for a run...and that doesn't happen very often. I played sports growing up, so I am sure this plays a factor into my activity levels.

My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is number 1 in my life. He is always with me, and even when I wandered away through college, He never left me or forsook me. I am tempted to say my faith has never been stronger, and I pray that my co-workers, patients, family, and friends see the love I have in my heart for my Lord and Savior!

I think I will let the introductions end for now...but trust me, you'll learn more about me in the upcoming days/weeks/months.

Talk to ya later...

Spring Time Flowers

I live in Western New York, and Spring is one of my favorite seasons...because to me, it represents LIFE! After a dead, gloomy winter the spring time flowers, grass, and even buds on the trees shows the cycle of life coming alive again!

This reminds me of the rebuilding process the Holy Spirit guides and directs us through. Lets face it, too many times we mess up and say the quick "forgiveness" prayer without really asking for forgiveness. I don't think it is until we do something "really big" that we truly seek after forgiveness. For me, these past few months have been about reconnecting with my Heavenly Father. College took me much farther away from Him then I even like to think about. Even once I came home, and got reconnected with my church on a regular basis, my walk certainly wasn't what it was supposed to be.

Back in January my sunday school class started a new devotional book, "Lord, I need Grace to make it Today" By Kay Arthur. I didn't realize at the time just what this book was going to force me to examine, but only the Lord could have known just what my broken heart needed. This book brought healing at a level I never expected possible. I still struggle admitting to others my mistakes, but I think at this time they aren't necessary. This book took me through the necessary steps for healing to really begin.

I had to come face to face with my wrong doings, yet see how much my precious Savior gave up for me that day on the Cross. It should have been me on that cross. I should suffer eternal separation from my Lord and Savior. Yet with the salvation offered to me, and the "wipe the slate clean" Lord I worship, I will see Him face to face someday.

So as I finish this sunday school book, I feel like the spring time flowers, blossoming in new, vibrant colors, ready to show the world that the "long winter nights" can bring me down, but they won't kill me off! My guilt is still there, but I no longer fear for my salvation. I know that the Lord will use my past mistakes into something positive in my future!

Todays Message

Church today really got me thinking...good thought and not so pleasent thoughts. What kind of a Christian really am I? From the outside, I may appear to have it all together, and be the "perfect, little Christian", but deep down inside I bear many scars. Scars that My Savior, while He knew I would encounter them, forgave me for.

My Pastor has been focusing on Matthew 5:1-12, the Beatitudes. He has come up with little "catch-phrases" to help make the verses more "modern", shall we say.

Vs. 3-- Bankrupt over sin Vs. 7-- Mercy Givers
Vs. 4--Broken over sin Vs. 8--Purity Seekers
Vs. 5--Control over sin Vs. 9-- Relationship Restorers
Vs. 6--Crave righteousness over sin Vs. 10-- Righteous Witnesses

There's a reason why I have them paired up this way....pretty much God has taught us that we must deal with the Inward Traits(column 1) before we can have an Outward Demonstration(column 2).

The pairing that hits me most, is actually the 2nd one. "Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted", vs. 4. When I think of the word Mourn, I think of funerals, and how I cry over the sadness of losing someone that I loved. I really feel that God wants us to no only repent from our sins, but if we are willing to make a life-style change, that we have to physically MOURN our sins. WHAT!? you ask? God is placing it on my heart, that I can't really move on from sinning without prayerfully, humbly meaning it from the deepest parts of my heart.

It hurts so badly to think about the sins I have committed. Conscience decisions that I made to do wrong. Even though I knew they were wrong, I still did them. Time and time again. And yes, I have asked for repentance. BUT if in that situation again, will I stick to my convictions??

This is where vs. 8 comes into play. "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." Pastor Dave referred to them as "Purity Seekers". They are truly broken over sin and are seeking a pure heart....so they may not repeat the sin cycle. They see the sin as God sees it, and they want a clean (pure) heart before the Lord.

The part that really has me thinking is that they are "broken over their sin" so they "won't repeat the cycle." I long for God's forgiveness, which he has given to me. But I think in my heart, I "hurt" for my sins...but am I "broken" over them? This is where my thoughts dive deeper into my inner most being, as I force myself to study my heart and see where I really am.

I have played the hypocritical Christian before. Most people don't know just how badly I fooled them. I knew what to say, how to act, and how to respond to any and every situation. I have been working on my relationship with the Lord for a while now, and finally feel as though I am "through" the "fake" stage...although it wouldn't take much for me to get back to that. I NEED Jesus to be real in my life. I have far too much hurt in my life to do this on my own. I've messed it up enough. I need Jesus to be my light. While it kills me to not know the future, it's also where I need to just trust him.

Wow...talk about rambling. Guess I had a lot on my heart tonight...